When you are in high school, breaking up seems like the end of the world. Not even a sit down talk with mom or dad could fix the pain in your heart. When you are in college, a break up is devastating, but easier to manage. You know how to get up and at least make the appearance of looking fine. As you get older, breaking up never gets easier, but handling it get's smoother. All in all, there is nothing like the heartbreak of being heart broken. How do you handle that pain? How should you move on, or should you even move on?
Psalms 46:1 says that God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Now, some of you might be saying, "so what?" Others might be saying, "what does that have to do with this?" You have to remember that God is a personal God. He cares about everything. I remember I had a long day at work and needed to open a jar for my mom. I was too exhausted to open the new jar, so I asked God to help. Less than five seconds later, it was opened. God cares about everything in our life, including our love life. He cares so much that He has open arms at all times to take you in. He is your refuge. He will protect you from the pain. He is your strength. He will get you on your feet and moving. He is a very present help in trouble! When there is trouble, He is right there next to you ready to help. That is the God that we serve.
Sometimes, we go through serious break ups from seriously bad relationships. Sometimes we are being abused physically, mentally, spiritually, financially, or emotionally. In Romans 12:19, it says, "Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, 'vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.'" Do not try to get back at your ex if they try to abuse you. Instead, break up with them and let the Lord handle the work! Take refuge in Christ and know that there is a better person out there for you. Anyone who would hit you once would hit you again. Anyone who would steal from you once would steal from you again. If someone is playing mind games with you, do not let them trap you into a life of depression. If anyone would play with your emotions, they are not mature enough to be with. If anyone would try to step between your relationship with God, do not let them become an idol.
Sometimes the relationship isn't abusive, but the ending was on a bad note. It could involve cruel words, a slap, a hit, cheating, or even gossiping or spreading rumors, true or false. You may be tempted to return the favor. "Well, she told all of her girlfriends this. I'll go spread a rumor about her." Or maybe even, "You heard him tell you that about me? Well, when we were together he would do THIS." We must not be angry at the end of it all. We cannot allow bitterness to fester in our hearts. Matthew 5:39 says to turn the other cheek. We must let God handle that person. And besides, if they would be so immature as to gossip or spread rumors after having feelings for you, that is someone that you cannot associate yourself with in that moment. You must work on yourself and prosper yourself in Christ. Don't gossip back. Instead, be an example of Christ for them and all who see.
Look at Matthew 5:4. "Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." When you go through a break up, do not be afraid to cry or show your emotions. Cry out to God and He will comfort you! Let Him hear your heart! It is alright to have a moment of sadness or weakness. It is a break up! We are still human! Yes, turn to God, but do not try to suppress the pain. Bring it before God and let Him deal with it so that you may be healed, and understand that it may take some time and that it is alright if it does take time. We are human. We cannot always bounce back.
Just remember this one thing. Put God first and turn to Him whenever your heart is broken, not to any other person or any vice. God should be the first one you go to, and the last one you find yourself going to. He will never leave you nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6) and He is your refuge and strength (Psalms 46:1) Trust in Him to fix your heart and let Him be first in your life at all times. He will bless you if you serve Him. When you serve Him, everything always works out for the best.
-D
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